If you’re on your first matleave and you’re coming out of the haze of having a baby, feeding schedules, barely sleeping etc, it’s time to start mom-dating. If this isn’t your first rodeo then you know what’s up, hey girl.
Like most people, I have my core group of friends and I tend to meet new people through work or hobbies. Once you have a baby, those friends don’t go away, they just have jobs that they go to while you are home with baby and depending on whether or not they have kids, they have different schedules and social needs. Meeting other moms and dads who have kids of similar age is what is going to get you through the good and the tough times. Mom-dating is just like regular dating, projected through your kid. And if you’re like me, you’re out of practice with dating. But after a pep-talk in front of a mirror, clean-hair (you know what I’m talking about), and a cute outfit, you’re feeling ready to make friends!
- Hit up parks, play-gyms and find mom-groups in your neighbourhood. Grabbing a coffee and walking alone with your baby won’t yield new friends, but grabbing a coffee and heading to a park, even if your baby isn’t ready for the equipment will get you chatting to other moms who are just hanging out watching their kids.
- Put yourself out there – be open!
- But not too open… don’t seem desperate (this is a joke… mostly).
- “How old is your little guy?” is basically the mom version of “So do you come here often?”
- Remember to actually introduce yourself! People are going to ask what your kids name is, as well as their developmental milestones, eating likes and even BM schedule – but it’s actually rare that people remember to ask the adults their names.
- Think back….Way back to a time that you had hobbies and a workplace you went to everyday, and delight your potential friend with chatter that is not only focused on kids. It’s hard but you can do it!
- Find out if they drink wine… because you can only have so many cups of coffee a day.
- Not sure if you should jump in to exchanging numbers or stalking them on Facebook, take the middle ground and suggest that you might be at the same park next week. Chances are your potential new friend has been dazzled by your charm and would be happy to have you to hang with. social media stalking is a total given.
- ]Follow through.
All joking aside, meeting new people can be tough. It’s likely been awhile since you dated or had to make new friends on your own. You’re not looking for love, so just be open to finding likeminded people to hang out with and pass the time while the kids discover things on their own. They’ll be glad that their mom isn’t in their face for an hour and you’ve got a whole new crew to roll with.